Robyn Hitchcock is a weird guy. But I'll use his lyrics to one-up Webster on their definition of my friend S.'s new favorite word. See which one you remember better:
coquette (n) - MW: "a woman who endeavors without sincere affection to gain the attention and admiration of men"
coquette (n) - me, via RH: "you've been laying eggs under my skin"
Both sound vaguely sinister I guess, but it's really about playfulness - and anyone who likes Hitchcock's songs knows that he's nuts but anything but literal. The eggs metaphor is a good one, as the hatching part is most likely left up to the skin's owner. The coquette can't be held entirely responsible if her victim is silently complicit in greater damage. At what point does such behavior cross over into "sincere affection" anyway?
One of the most important "social skills" I've picked up on, is defining the limits of that kind of banter with everyone you interact with. Given enough time, anyone can do it, but the skill lies in feeling it out as quickly as possible. As someone who tends to enjoy gently overstepping my bounds, I have sometimes found myself hitting the gas a little too hard - it's a social lead foot, if you will. Fifteen-year-old B. would lower his brow in a silent reprimand, rejecting the "manipulation," but now it feels like a necessity if I want to get myself anywhere. 's not wrong, is it?
One of the most important "social skills" I've picked up on, is defining the limits of that kind of banter with everyone you interact with. Given enough time, anyone can do it, but the skill lies in feeling it out as quickly as possible. As someone who tends to enjoy gently overstepping my bounds, I have sometimes found myself hitting the gas a little too hard - it's a social lead foot, if you will. Fifteen-year-old B. would lower his brow in a silent reprimand, rejecting the "manipulation," but now it feels like a necessity if I want to get myself anywhere. 's not wrong, is it?
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